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From the Humorous Mind of JerseyJohn#2

Posted by Jake on May 8, 2013 at 1:35 AM Comments comments (8)

From the Humorous Mind of JerseyJohn#2

Funeral services have been scheduled for Anton Wyzek, 19, who died of a single gunshot wound over ten days ago but whose body has been retained by the police pending the results of an on-going  investigation. 


In a brief press conference at the precinct early yesterday morning, police spokesman Humpty Krupke stated that the investigation had been completed and the Department was satisfied that the initial arrest of Mr. Chino Martino would indeed result in an indictment, and ultimately a conviction. 


Initially, according to Sergeant Krupke, an anonymous tip had been received, indicating that Anton Wyzek's death was the result of a conspiracy, possibly a Mob hit for hire. 


The tipster had implicated Mr. Larry Kert as the leader of the conspiracy, which allegedly was made up of several  handsome young men with trained voices who wanted Mr. Wyzek "out of the way once and for all." 

"Mr. Kert's alibi held up," Sergeant Krupke told reporters. "He was in Poughkeepsie doing Brigadoon. O rmaybe he was in Brigadoon doing Poughkeepsie. Anyways, there ain't nothing to the conspiracy story.   Though,"he added, "I'd-a gotten a big boot outta meeting Elvis Presley. Can't have everything." 


"We suspicion the job was not done by a bunch of singers,"Officer Krupke concluded. 


Mr. Wyzek's murder will therefore be charged to Mr. Martino, who is awaiting arraignment in Sing Sing, and who is allegedly part of a love triangle involving his own fiancée and Mr. Wyzek. 


The third party, Maria Nunez of Manhattan, was informed of Chino Martino's arrest, but she declined the opportunity to pay a visit to the jail to see him. "When I look at Chino, nothing happens," she said decisively. 


Miss Nunez was briefly suspected of Mr. Wyzek's murder, since her  fingerprints were the only ones lifted from the murder weapon. However she was acquitted when police determined that she did not know how the pull a trigger without someone showing her. 


Although police officers had immediately rushed to the scene of the crime, Mr. Wyzek's body was ultimately carried to the morgue, not by medical or law-enforcement personnel, but by five or six gang members who dropped him several times along the way. 


Miss Nunez gave a fond history of her relationship with her star-crossed boyfriend. She spoke from the parlor of her modest apartment, wearing a charming white dress with a plunging neckline. 


"Tony was the most thoughtful boy," she remarked, recalling the highlights of their twenty-six hour courtship. "He would take me to—"   She paused, frowning."Well, actually, he never took me anywhere.But he would bring me—well, no, I guess he never bought me anything either."She glanced into the kitchen, where her father, Papa Nunez, a local shopkeeper and Off-screen Voice, was having a cup of tea. "Well," she began again. "He loved to play games.  For instance, that afternoon, he came to the bridal shop where I work and we played  Wedding. And then tha tnight he came to my room and we played  Honeymoon." She smiled inprivate reminiscence. "As long as he didn't try to sing, he was wonderful. Or act," she added hastily, remembering. 


Mr. Wyzek is survived by his mother, Mrs. Gert Wyzek-Robinson, and a half-sisterElaine Robinson. Mr. Wyzek's mother recalled his high spirits and optimism. "He went around the house for several days  telling me, `Something's coming, Ma,something's coming.' He was sure that something was coming. I don't figure he guessed that what was coming was a bullet in his gut. Boy, I bet that surprised him, you think?" 


Mrs. Wyzek-Robinson is planning to move to California to join her estranged second husband, Crusoe Robinson of Beverly Hills. "Too much killing in this city," she declared. "I want Elaine to growup in a good neighborhood, maybe meet a nice boy with a promising future." 

Funeral services are scheduled for Tuesday at The Birth to Earth Cathedral on Amsterdam Avenue at 10.00 a.m. A small private reception will follow, hosted by famed singing artists Milli Vanilli.





From the Humorous Mind of JerseyJohn

Posted by Jake on May 8, 2013 at 1:25 AM Comments comments (11)

From the Humorous Mind of JerseyJohn





New York…Police official broke up yet another skillfully choreographed, singing street brawl Saturday that left two dead, as rival gangs of dancing, knife-wielding toughs danced intimidatingon the streets of New York’s West Side.

According to Officer Krupkeof New York’s 32nd Precinct, the youths are members of two rival gangs, the Jets, composed of American-born boy, and the Sharks, composed ofyoung Puerto Ricans.

“These hoodlums and theirbeautifully choreographed violence must be stopped,” said Krupke, who works the West Side beat.  “They show no respectfor law-enforcement officials such as myself. They mock us in song.”

Police coverage for the West Side is slated to be doubled following the show-stopping killings last night.

Members of the gangs have been witnessed singing about the joys of juvenile delinquency and lifting each other into the air by the waist.  They also snap their fingers while crouching menacingly and leaping high into theair, witnesses have reported.

Krupke warned citizens stay clear of the deadly street-prancing and elaborately staged musical numbers.   He said the toughs can be identified by their headbands, three-quarter- length pants and formed fittingstriped shirts, which have greatly helped them execute their terrifying stringof dancing fights.  


Westsidestorians: A Quick History and Tribute

Posted by Jake on April 28, 2013 at 8:05 PM Comments comments (7)

Once upon a time, at thebeginning of the new millennium, during a moment of chance internet surfing, I stumbled upon a messageboard devoted to my favorite musical, both stage and film, West Side Story.  Some of the morecolorful devotees who populated this space also belonged to a yahoo group knownas the Westsidestorians and immediately took me into the fold.   Like the Jets who were never disconnected and home with their own, I now had brothers (and a few sisters around) and my new relatives included Floridajake(founder of the Westsidestorians), JerseyJohn, Mike, Miki, Mitch, Richard, JohnClynes, Kristin, Charity, Gwen, Ann, Tom, Kevin, Brian, and a few others who floated in and out of cyber space.  But our interactions were not limited to the web; there were phone calls, snail mail, gift exchanges, actual person to person meetings, and even a creative collaboration between myself and Mitch resulting in the short film Eli’s Run, inspired by Mitch’s music. 

At some point, the origina lBaby John and film’s A-Rab, David Winters, joined the tribe and provided hours of entertainment and backstage gossip. Floridajake then proposed to me the idea of creating a tribute site to David as a way of saying thank you.  Soon afterwards David managed to get his good buddy, Tony Mordente (A-Rab onBroadway and Action in film) on the forum, and when Tony initially declined tohave a tribute site in his honor, FloridaJake waged an aggressive campaign to convince Tony to change his mind. Whether Tony finally agreed because he was flattered or just wanted to getus all off his back, we shall never know, but that was the genesis of the website era, which produced a few others including, my own Jetsandsharks101 andJerseyJohn’s site devoted to stage productions.

The middle of the firs tdecade saw growth in the community and the emergence of trolls and malcontents who like the Emeralds and Hawks tried to take over our turf.    While we were willing to share our turf with any genuine fan, many of us were feeling discouraged and under constant attack, so while we continued to visit the established boards, we also created an undisclosed invite-only turf where we could communicate without distraction or cyberbullying.  This new turf, which we christened Seinfeld served as our main playground for the next few years, which now can be viewed as our goldenyears. 

The second decade of this millennium saw many changes regarding online activity and communities.    Myspace and then Facebook became the means of connecting, and pretty much replacing established messageboards; some core members found less and less time in their busy lives to drop in and chat, and sadly, three beloved and essential members left us to join Riff, Bernardo andTony snapping their fingers in the playground in the sky:  FloridaJake, JerseyJohn, and Tom.  Womb to tomb; we so miss you, dearbrothers. 

The initial thrill o fcommunicating with fellow fans and even those who were part of the main productions is gone.  The daily ritual of logging onto the forum, the yahoo group and Seinfeld to see what was going on is over.   The dragging myself out of bed on a Saturday morning to chat for a few hours (yeah I actually did that) and then climbing back into bed to nap till a more reasonable hour is a thing of the past; but the memories of that era are still vivid and cherished and I truly believe I would not be the owner of multiple sites,the friends of fellow fans and actual cast members and the recipient of so many cool experiences if I had not happen upon those sites and became part of that family. 

Our beloved brothers,Floridajake, Jersey John, and Tom all embraced and utilized modern technology to share the love of WSS and I think they would all be pleased to see the continued interest in this masterpiece, and the continued friendship among the core Westsidestorians.  And I think they would happy to see, that while we no longer call ourselves Westsidestorians,our family is still going strong and accepting new members. 

To Floridajake, JerseyJohn,and Tom, from all of us:  You done good,buddy boys. 



They Did Good Buddy Boy: Review of Our Story

Posted by Jake on March 14, 2012 at 1:55 AM Comments comments (2)

This is a must read not just for West Side Story fans, but also for anyone who appreciates the creative process that goes into film making. The passion for the dance is expressed through the eyes of each author, making the pages come to life.

I had no doubt that the writers would provide an up-close and personal view of the agony of auditions (multiples in many cases), the grueling hours of rehearsals, the sore muscles, and in the end, the deep satisfaction of contributing to one of the greatest film classic of all time. And the writers did not disappoint. If that was all there was, that would have been enough. The writers however, were young, gorgeous, talented and creative with a bit of a rebellious streak and a penchant for fun guaranteeing that the good memories created were not restricted to the screen.

Before even reaching Los Angeles, Tony Mordente had to deal with his dogs and along with Tommy Abbott, endure an “easy rider” type of experience in Texas. Bob Banas had a suspicion that some friends were playing a prank on him when he first got a call for auditions; Maria Jimenez Henley literally almost went from hospital to first rehearsal. Tucker Smith not only participated in the infamous rain dances, but also impulsively led a parade (told by at least three witnesses). Jerome Robbins wanted the two gangs to stay away from each other in order to create a sense of rivalry, but in the beginning the real rivalry was between the west coast dancers and the east coast dancers. Surprisingly enough, the long hours under their difficult taskmaster fueled their verve to fill their down time with some intense poker games that sometimes included a monkey and Mickey Rooney, play cowboys with horses and guns, conduct chariot races, and drive their poor assistant director Robert Relyea almost insane and even incur the wrath of Billy Wilder. Bonus trivia: There is a Star Trek connection.

The writers of course grew up and matured into seasoned professionals with amazing resumes, never losing their West Side Story siblings. The continuous crossing of paths both professionally and personally is one of the more touching element of the book.

To read this book is to learn about backstage anecdotes on the filming of West Side Story, the trials and tribulations of a dancer and the joy and beauty of longtime friendships.